July 15, 2011

Collin

Collin, age 7
Hampshire, England (1997)

This is me and my little sister, back when I was a young girl named Naomi.
I was always a bit of a tomboy and always asked to have short hair, which Mum was reluctant to let me do. Unfortunately, she was proven right, as when I started Junior High, I was forced to grow it again, due to relentless bullying.

I didn't realize I was unusual until my sister was born. I'd always assumed that what I thought was normal: To wish you'd been born a boy, or hope you'd wake up one morning as a boy.

I fit in well with my younger brothers. But as I grew up, I started realizing that maybe I was the odd one out. I hated puberty and felt completely alienated from everyone around me, particularly as I went to an all-girls' school.

I'd heard of lesbians being different, so I tried looking at girls. But they still didn't interest me, so I gave up.

I first hear the word "transgender" in college, as a friend I made there was transitioning from male to female.

And right away it made sense, even though I was scared to admit it to anyone. When I finally told my parents, they'd been expecting it for a while, although they still weren't happy about it.

I had a few bad reactions from friends too, particularly my then-boyfriend who caused me to end up in the hospital for a day. But on the whole, it went OK.

Today, I've just finished my 2nd year of a 3-year university degree. I've been on testosterone for over a year, and I'm preparing for top surgery soon. My family and friends are supportive, and I'm much more comfortable with who I am.

One troubling comment I got back then was:
"Why can't you just be a straight girl? It would be so much easier."

So to any other gay or transgender people out there, I'd say to believe in yourself. Transitioning is about showing who you are, so don't let other people tell you what's right for you. It may be harder at first, but it's worth it in the long run.
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July 13, 2011

Nikki

Nikki, age 7
Wheeling, W. Virginia (1979)

I grew up in a Catholic household in West Virginia. I attended Catholic school for 12 years and never heard anyone talk about being gay until I was in high school. Of course, when I did hear these comments, they were not positive.

I think that I always knew that I was different than the other girls in my neighborhood and school. At that time, I had short hair and was into sports, more than any of my friends.

I resisted wearing dresses or anything girly. I spent my time hanging out with the boys in the neighborhood, playing tackle football, instead of playing house with the girls.

I remember once, right around age 7, telling one of my friends in the neighborhood that I was really a boy, but that we just told people that I was a girl.

I remember that the one thing she said was, "But then you won't be able to have babies!" I didn't really care about having babies, so I just shrugged my shoulders. But she was really upset about it.

She told her mom what I had told her. Her mom, of course, told my mom and
I got in trouble for lying. Looking back now, I know that I didn't really want to
be a boy. What I wanted was what boys could have: relationships with girls.

Today, I am completely out to my family and they have been very supportive.
I am also out at work and have some great, supportive co-workers.

What I would tell the youth of today, is to find people who will support you and
let you be yourself. Life is amazing when you can finally be yourself!

Nikki's first, famous-person same sex crush:
Nancy McKeon (Jo on "The Facts of Life")
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The Facts of Life - The Complete Third SeasonLoving Mountains, Loving Men (Ethnicity & Gender In Appalach)Fortunate Families: Catholic families with lesbian daughters and gay sons

Also check out "My First Gay Crush Blog"

July 10, 2011

Jeferson

Jeferson, age 7
Novo Hamburgo, Brazil (1991)

This is me and my sister, and one of my "My Little Pony" dolls, which I collected for 4 years.

As a kid, I felt torn between playing games and toys meant for girls, or those meant for boys.

In my confusion, I didn't know
if I wanted to be He-Man, or be
She-Ra. Hahaha!

I always had more female friends as a kid, and was the target of bullying for it.


I was extremely shy, and I spent my entire adolescence without feeling accepted or understood. I was very inexperienced, and felt I could not approach the girls. But when I was 25, I had my first kiss with a woman.

It was only after entering the theater that I decided to accept myself as gay,
and try being with guys. Once I did, I knew being with men was my true nature.

I eventually told my godfather (who is also gay) and who was a childhood friend of my father. Today, my whole family accepts me and supports me.

Jeferson's first, famous-person same sex crushes:
Jonathan Knight & Joey McIntyre (from New Kids on The Block)
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New Kids On The Block: Greatest Hits - The VideosMy Little Pony > Rainbow Dash with Skirt DollThe Politics of Sexuality in Latin America: A Reader on Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, and Transgender Rights (Pitt Latin American Studies)

Also check out "My First Gay Crush Blog"

July 05, 2011

Denise

Denise, age 5
Chicago, Illinois (1963)

I would have thought that being thrown out of the Girl Scouts when I was 8 -
for being caught in my sleeping bag with one of my female camp counselors - would have tipped someone off!

Like many before me, I knew early on I was "different" but so afraid to name it.
I didn't want to be a disappointment to my parents and family. Growing up in a large Italian family was tough enough.

Being a lesbian would have destroyed them. Or so I thought. Of course, like most Italian families, we didn't dare talk about such things!

I tried to be correct in my clothes choices and my dating, etc. Although always in sports (clue #2), I pretty much stuck to myself except for the occasional date with a guy to keep my family happy.

I eventually met a nice man named James.
And he put up with a lot from me.

James and I married, and I struggled the entire marriage to make it feel "right." And I wanted to be "normal" in the worst way. We finally divorced and went our separate ways when I met a woman at work, who turned my world upside down.

I officially came out to my family then. And guess what? They weren't surprised!
I was prepared for drama that never came; only love for me through my journey.

I eventually met my current partner in 1983. And we have been friends, lovers, and partners in life ever since. We have 2 beautiful teenage sons, own our own businesses, and a home in Denver, CO. And although our state doesn’t recognize our relationship, all the people that matter and mean the most to us, do.

One day, hopefully soon, we may be able to get legally married.
So my message is this: It does get better. Stay true to you.
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Click here - "Born This Way: Real Stories of Growing Up Gay" book
Click here - "My First Gay Crush Blog"
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